May 11, 2013

There are days of fear and dread, when the desolation of our souls presses so greatly as to hinder breath.

Dawn birthed another such day and … here … we … sit.  

January 28, 2013
Six Days of Vacation

Anyone who actually HAS vacation days knows how precious they are, how carefully we hoard them, how miserly we are as we spend them.  And so, it is with good reason you might ask how I recently spent six days of vacation.

Full disclosure, I have 20 days of vacation to spend each “year” (hire date anniversary to hire date anniversary).   Usually, I spend them on stay-cations, doing chores and errands or being home when my son visits.

At church on Sunday, Jason our Director of Christian Education (DCE) asked if I would be interested in going to Connecticut with the church’s Comfort Dogs to help out for a week.  There have been Comfort Dogs there since it happened in December, but they needed “fresh” dogs to come help out.  Our dogs, new to us after the tornado in Joplin, had never made such a trip before.  But it seemed right to respond to the call for help.

This is a busy time of year at work, but the boss OK’d it and four days later we left on Friday to give the dogs a day of rest after two days of travel.

The area is wooded, rolling hills, with “towns” bunched close, indistinguishable one from another.  There are about 27,000 people living there.  It seemed very much like home, in that respect.  Small town, close knit.

We “worked” the dogs at a church, at a mall, at a surprise party at Town Hall, at a call center, a dance studio, the middle school, the “new” Sandy Hook at Chalk Hill, at the senior center and at a preschool.   The dogs love to work and be petted.  People young and old love to pet dogs.  In some small way it was perhaps therapeutic.  We were thanked again and again.

We took pictures, but always only with permission.  The town is weary of the media spotlight.  Understandably wary of prying eyes.

We became better handlers and grew to admire the strength and discipline of the dogs.  Their work is draining.  To be still, to be of comfort, when all around are smells and noises and, sometimes, poking fingers, takes great concentration on their part.  

The five of us on the trip learned much about one another, too.  I still feel new, having only returned to this particular congregation two years ago.  Barely knowing everyone’s names, my introversion had me quiet for a few days.  But working the dogs requires a certain level of engagement that spilled over to the group, and ultimately I learned a bit more about everyone.

This was a new type of vacation for me, but it was good.  I’ll be shopping for more such vacations.   If you’ve never taken vacation to help out, consider it. 

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December 24, 2012

December 21, 2012

The water is cold
The water is cold

Slipping beneath
Dark and quiet

Tired
Heavy

The water is cold

November 16, 2012
Words with Strangers

I don’t play Words with Friends. I’d be mortified for friends to know how much time I spend playing and how pedestrian my vocabulary is.

8:55am  |   URL: http://tmblr.co/ZzxkJyXOMHVB
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August 4, 2012

Hello there, my lovely.  Do you know I miss you?  Do you know you are loved?

May 23, 2012
I have a problem

Someone “announces” the items they bring into my office.  For example, when placing the remittances I need to review and sign into my inbox, this person says “Here are the remittances!”  To clarify, remittances are processed every week and are not particularly extraordinary.

Everything – and I am not exaggerating, it is everything – brought to my office is announced with a description.  Sometimes a deadline is also mentioned.  But always the description.

I actually said once, “You don’t need to announce things you bring to my office.  It’s OK.  I’ll figure it out.”  But the practice persists.

It is not that new items in the office are offensive, per se.  Tiring perhaps.   Many people bring many items.  Often they can do it without me even noticing they’ve come and gone. 

It is not that I find the person particularly grating, such that anything said is annoying.  A simple “How’s it going?” would not rankle.  It is this particular, persistent, pathological practice which is distracting me from the myriad of other things I should be doing.

Why does this bother me?  To ask again for it to stop would hurt feelings and I don’t want to do that.  Any suggestions or thoughts?

1:48pm  |   URL: http://tmblr.co/ZzxkJyL-pDBU
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April 29, 2012
The Horror

By day, the neighbors’ dogs are OK.  They bark.  They are supposed to.  They are dogs.  By night, however, when it is dark and there are no cars and it is late…the new neighbor’s dog barks so viciously at … something … making both the dog and the unknown something rather scary. 

It’s probably a moth. 

Or a bunny.

January 22, 2012
Does this happen to you?

I received a phone call last night from someone I very seldom hear from.  They offered me a photo they found and I said I’d love to have it, thank you.  The response I got was “I knew if I offered you a picture, you’d talk to me.”  I replied they need not do so; that I’d talk with them regardless.  They replied they call all the time and I don’t return the calls and/or I’m never home.  I denied it - in truth I have no idea what they are talking about - but they persisted.

I let it drop.  They clearly felt righteous about the whole thing. 

They then let me know about all the financial ills in their life as well as in the lives of their children.

What am I to do with all this?  Write checks? 

From the description, I know I already have the photo. 

Mercy and benevolence for another is not predicated on their attention to me or the “proper phrasing” of their request.  Yet, I feel chafed by the inelegantly dropped hints and implied judgment I’ve been inattentive.  I am bothered.

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January 19, 2012
Why

So…had some tests.  3 or 4 vials of blood.  Diagnostic at the hospital.  Blood-work came back just fine.  Waited for results of the other.  And waited.  Called nurse today.  Was told the results were “essentially normal.”  I of course inquire as to the difference between essentially normal and normal.  Does this mean there’s nothing new, nothing not already discussed?  I get, again, “the results were essentially normal” with no further exposition but noticeable snark.  Why?

I’m going to go on with life and ignore the whole affair.

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November 26, 2011
Milestone?

1,500 posts (exactly 1,500 - prior to this one anyway)

100 pages of posts

50 followers

It’s a bit creepy how round and even the numbers are, all aligned.  Like when you happen to notice the odometer just as it turns to the next thousand miles.  It’s just one more number though, isn’t it?  We assign significance to numbers to remind us of the passage of time, how finite things are. 

I wonder - don’t you? - if this isn’t all just self-absorption to no good end.  If someone is encouraged out there it might make it worth it.  If not, this is a distraction best put away. 

Thoughts when I’m tired. 

9:18pm  |   URL: http://tmblr.co/ZzxkJyCTZFvB
  
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November 25, 2011
Husbandry

You do not actually save money by spending money, no matter what the discount may be.  You have exchanged money for goods or services and now possess less money.  If said goods or services are NEEDED, your decision may be frugal.  If, as is often the case, the goods or services merely satisfy a perceived desire, at best your decision is a bit of whimsy.  At worst, and most likely, your decision reinforces the regrettable habits of bad math (you have NOT saved money) and indulgent excess, often to the detriment of more noble pursuits for the betterment of others.  Pretending otherwise, or reveling in bald acknowledgment, bears no good fruit.

November 22, 2011
Why doesn’t the “I Dream of Jeannie” theme (or alternatively, the Jeopardy them) play during “wait times”?

When files are loading, when transactions are “processing”, etc.  How cool would that be?  Also, Jeopardy is a hard word to spell.

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